ROBOT PRETZEL

listen man, i dont know who the fuck you are,

2012-02-11T09:24:00.001-08:00

but get the fuck out of my room and stop touching my stuff, you fucking fat ass.

damn, i thought stuff like this doesnt happen anymore :/ fuck you dubai, fuck slavery

2012-02-04T05:52:00.000-08:00

this is just like Transformers: Exodus, except the slave class doesnt turn into Decepticons

Platonic Friends

2012-01-31T09:02:00.000-08:00

when you're not good enough

2012-01-26T13:08:00.000-08:00

you have two types, good people who are purely good, and good people with bad habits, its just that those things won't affect anyone around them in particular, just themselves (like smoking), so it kind of does not matter but its still frowned upon in society, but whatever, they're good people, no difference.

but the pure ones would still be friends with the latter out of sincerity, while the ones with bad habits would do the same among their ranks just because they can relate.

so yes, there is a difference, and i am forever humbled.

that moment when your friend acknowledges that you were right

2012-01-26T09:26:00.000-08:00

I FUCKING TOLD YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOO yeay

to all the people who think that they are so mature for the world just because they were in love: fuck you guys, seriously. i know that your brains would sort themselves out eventually, but why not now? at the age of 18. teenage love doesn't always have to be like the stereotype it revolves around.

please break the innocent girl-jerky boyfriend cycle by coming to your fucking senses instead of repeatedly submitting to that jerk of a boyfriend you have like the dumbass you are and then calling all guys dumbasses,

same goes to the guy who tries to hit on every girl and calls all of them bitches when he fails. bitch-ass casanova poser.

oh gawd im starting to look like amira nasiruddin by doing this but i just think that someone should see this even if no one cares

2012-01-24T14:31:00.000-08:00

like oh

my glob

you guys

im starting to see your smiles in a different light, is it mean for me to deny this? but i think it should've happened sooner who knew

2012-01-23T11:28:00.000-08:00

also stuff like this shouldn't happen and im not allowing myself this until im a friggin adult :l like a real one, maybe when im 22.

so i think that you guys should know that SOUTH AFRICA WAS AWESOME

2012-01-20T03:21:00.001-08:00

i be uploadin photos l8ter arrrr.

somewhere in a galaxy far far away

2012-01-09T13:08:00.001-08:00

i've never missed you this much in my entire life :(

leaving for buenos aires in a few hours

2012-01-07T04:50:00.000-08:00

which would take me about 8 hours? idk and then i'll be there for two days and then i'll go to cape town, and both trips would take about twenty hours, like what the fuck. see you in two weeks motherfuckersssssss! (actually its one week and six days, arriving here on the 20th of jan). adventure awaits.

don't watch a movie called The Darkest Hour, it sucks balls. drawing with a friend however is fun

2012-01-03T04:41:00.000-08:00

i am officially bored with the internet

2011-12-25T08:14:00.000-08:00

she just looks so friggin.....AVERAGE <3

crappy feelings on crushes and what not

2011-12-21T12:09:00.000-08:00

in anotherr lifeeeeeeeeee

how exactly do you know if a person is the right one for you at an age like this? we all have that void to fill in ourselves, sometimes we feel incomplete. some people smoke, collect stuff, and some even murder the shit out of other people, but at the end of they day they realize that its not enough, so they keep doing the same things to fill in that empty void. some people even stretch out to great lengths to achieve this inner peace.

i personally think that people complete other people. no cigarettes, comics, or whatever. material things are important too and they help you cope with existance, but they don't really serve a purpose as to why you want to exist. i love money. anywayz, comics may last forever and drugs would be there until you use it all up, but people last with you, or at least close to it. some die earlier than others but they die happy knowing that their friends or spouses were by their side.

so like, i like this girl and had considered opening up to her and stuff but the chances of getting a "what is this i dont even.." is still there. its always there, the 50 percent. and just because someone likes you back it doesn't mean its a ticket to a beautiful relationship either. what if she's super mature and had her future thought out, like what if i would cheat on her or something. and i dont know about you guys but some people don't wanna even be in love because it might hurt so yeah that could be it too. it would be nice if the both of us could know how we feel about each other. but then what, we'd be friends? yeah most awkward friendship ever.

i dont know, to me, liking someone isn't enough. we'd have to know what ticks us off, and whether we'd accept ourselves at our worst. like me being okay with her having a fetish about aliens shooting paintings of ducks or her being okay with me breaking purple vases. but when you're 17 there are lots of restrictions, meet ups are hard with plkn in mind. and college. and my 2 week trip to south africa. maybe this is just a high school thing and there would be lots of other people like the ones we liked before in the future. the average human lives up to 72 years and who knows, i might meet someone who's just like me.

when you're this young and oblivious, are you meant to make decisions like this? its still too early to know and our adult selves in the future might not approve of what we did, we might fall in love with someone else when we've acquired different perspectives on what is good and long lasting. but what if some people were never meant to change?

and then comes regret and you'd feel like katy perry in the one that got away damn.

"Get a job"

2011-12-20T10:50:00.000-08:00

no thanks (for now).

life has been splendid ever since spm ended, and im not gonna spend my time serving the country's economy just yet. not until i enjoy my holidays to the fullest.

i prefer staying at home to be honest, a place where i can get my favorite food and snacks, a place where i can read and draw in peace, a place where i can play my goddamn video games without friends wanting to play as well, and a place where i can watch my favorite shows. plus, my parents live in it.

alot of things can be accomplished when one is not distracted by the outside world. i just finished making 18 pages of comic drafts! and a few concept arts about people in robot suits. just 96% away from completing my portfolio :D i've also managed to watch all the aired episodes of adventure time so far... and just a couple more episodes left till i finish futurama. i finally have the time to read Transformers: Exodus. It is a good read so far.

see see lots of things.

hahahaha

2011-12-19T07:59:00.001-08:00

SORRY AQMAL DAN SHAMSUL

i love you, home

2011-12-14T09:05:00.001-08:00

you walked up to my porch and you said hi

2011-12-07T09:10:00.001-08:00

forget pmr, im done with spm! :)

ASSHOLES

2011-12-03T08:00:00.001-08:00

DONT TOUCH MY THINGS WHEN IM NOT HOME. FUCK YOU, I HOPE SOMEONE RAIDS YOUR ROOM TO MESS AROUND WITH YOUR COLLECTION OF WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS THAT YOU LIKE. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU WITH AN ULTRA CAPITAL F

i miss you thiiiiiiiiiis much (don't count the number of i's because its not a proper method to measure things with)

2011-11-26T05:08:00.001-08:00

you can rain down on me like tetris blocks
all the rows you'd bring upon me wont matter
because between game overs and try agains
you know i'd pick the latter

its okay if you're no Samus Aran
a Princess Peach would do just fine
although i'd hate it when you're on Bowser's side
i wouldnt mind saving you a million times

in a world with big difficulty settings
don't you worry about making it through
just gear yourself with tons of hearts
and i'll be your player 2

babyyyyyyy

2011-11-18T04:30:00.000-08:00

as you may or may not know, my brother has a kid now!:D shes sooooooo cute and she likes to make funny faces when she sleeps. i'd normally find new borns boring as hell since they're all red and crying with no distinct features to speak of yet.. but this baby got my attention since everyone laid their eyes on her for the first time, and you'll feel all fuzzy inside when she grips your pinky, like in marinah's book. i mean you can look at her all day, when shes awake or asleep because her cheeks remind me of shin chan and mumble from happy feet :3 and shes sooo tiny! like a peanut hahaha so cute~ ) or a red bean. congratulations to my brother and kak ned for having my parents' first grandchild (its about time) and i shall make her my apperentice whether they like it or not hehe. i love baby and her cheeks they smell awesome.

arya aedreena <3 (i think her last name's spelling is kind of an overkill but its supposed to be a nod to my brother's name so whatever. and i was told tht arya is an italic name or something. that, and arya's the name of that elf chick from eragon.

ever been to a seminar with over a thousand participants in it?

2011-10-29T05:06:00.000-07:00

it was cool and there was this one girl in this long dress with long hair she was so cute. i can't wait for my hair to grow longer. i hope it wont get snipped by the teachers next week. i wonder what kind of flowers my mom likes. i didnt know she was into flowers. besides the boring flower portraits around the house that seriously suck ass, i never thought that she was THAT into flowers after that question. it was the first time i heard her ask my dad for a bouquet of flowers. "how come you never get me those?" she said, after watching the scene from that korean drama. its a nice show. is it a subtle joke? does my mom really like flowers? should i get her flowers next year? but flowers are friggin lame... why did she tell everyone about that girl in the dress? man she tells everyone everything about me.

i suck

2011-10-28T07:24:00.000-07:00

do you get protective or jealous over people who left an imprint on you, even when you got over them? past crushes, exes, i just get disturbed inside when guys approach them, even if i was the dumper. is it because my sub-concious doesnt want anyone to get hurt for the second time? is it because im nosy? is it because i can't accept that they're getting someone better? this makes me quite stern or kerek to innocent guys, and im afraid that i might ruin someone's day or even worse, a relationship, if i had accidentally let out personal things to prevent them from moving on to the next step. i really really want their future relationships to bloom into something amazing, i really do. i should isolate myself.

i fixed my sister's old music box

2011-10-26T10:57:00.000-07:00

i cut my thumb (like always) when i was trying to uncoil the ever so sharp spring but hearing the box sing that enchanting tune was worth it. i never understood how the spinning wing thingies could control the music's speed but whatever. it kinda gets me depressed, that tune. with the picture on the lid

im figuring you out, life

2011-10-21T12:44:00.000-07:00

when i have reached a ripe age of 30 or 40, will i feel the same way as most adults? i've never taken the scale of a human lifetime seriously until now. life is indeed very short. i'll be having my spm in 24 days. i thought it would take me longer but now that im finally here, now, in the year 2011.. i feel like i've just passed primary school last week. im running out of time, and i dont know how i should spend it. this is where i stop at a junction, with god on one side.

im still coping with the fact that time is irreversible (under the rule of a god, as he wont allow it). is it worth it, investing my time believing in such things?. but since we know nothing of this universe, our best bet is to tell ourselves that anything can happen. there might be a supreme power that judged adam and eve who cannot make their own decisions after all. there might be more in store for us, who knows. i am but a speck of dust on top of book pages, where no one would even want to glide their fingers on it.

how do i bring forth the old memories? i wish to relive certain events as i get older. should i indulge myself in such privileges (if the technology exists)? people say that we should keep on looking forward. it makes sense i guess, if we were to dedicate our lives to god. every second is spent with good deeds, then it gets processed or accounted for in some kind of record, only to be dismissed as it is already used up. the only thing left to do next is to move on to the next second and spend it with other good deeds. if we were able to contort time, that means less good deeds.

my religion gives my life boundaries. it affects how i view the concept of time, which affects how i think i should spend it, and i've come to the conclusion that this way of life is boring. but it promises something greater that cannot be comprehended by me, in the future. people of a godless universe would leave without the burden of judgement throughout their lives. unfortunately we dont know which universe we're in to make such a simple decision. but my religion's design is well thought out, it doesn't have any obvious flaws where you'd expect them to be, truly i am following the work of a genius.. or am i a pawn in an elaborate plan?

they say that one must not think about these things, it can get you nuts. religion is all about faith, as it is a bit difficult to prove, especially in this age of thriving intellectuals. but is it wise to ignore the inevitable conundrums that surround life?

as quoted by ezio: "i know that i dont have enough time to do everything, now i worry that i do not have enough time to do anything."

Bionicle Still Lives

2011-10-16T09:29:00.000-07:00

when it was discontinued i was dismayed at all the unanswered anomalies that were left to rot by themselves. fortunately, after safiah refused to tell me about that embarrassing plan of hers for next year i decided to visit the old bionicle wiki. it was updated! and i found out what was inside the red star that was orbiting mata nui for so long. turns out there was indeed someone in there and toa kopaka described its interior as "what the insides of a Toa might look like". and also tren krom died and there was this fugly deity looking monster experiment guy who visited the red star before kopaka.

bionicle should be a real universe with its very own religion.

butterflies feel like this

2011-10-09T07:50:00.001-07:00

Get your own valid XHTML YouTube embed code

whatnint

2011-10-08T09:58:00.001-07:00

singularity (finally not a love poem)

2011-10-04T08:27:00.000-07:00

its about how humans fail to coexist, each side trying to escape a world full of idiots (as biasedly defined by eachother)
____________________________________________________________________

like the stars, i wish to be in an infinite symphony
is there anyone out there, someone like me?

they're what keeps the universe lighted and they all blink the same
meanwhile i am earth-bound, but what of my name?

thunders of uncharted space questions if i'll make it through
are there others in the world who hide like i do?

i made a blackhole consume me, my heart ripped into two
should i design myself to create you?

why can't we all revolve around the same loving sun
the process of elimination has begun.

MAARINAAAH RAHMAAAAT

2011-09-27T04:32:00.000-07:00

could tell who i was from behind at mcdonalds in the queue despite not seeing me that often :D it was nice turning around to a familiar face that makes her look like she's blushing 87% of the time and you know when she smiles her eyes look like they're smiling too its like ^_^ but they're not closed all the way.

why i love walking past the cash converters store

2011-09-23T10:04:00.000-07:00

but its missing its helmet, its chest orb, the fire bird (which becomes the skirt) and the katana is replaced with a voltron sword....

absorbing 2 years worth of chapters in one night

2011-09-20T11:33:00.000-07:00

and hopefully i'll still remember them tomorrow. this song can put me to sleep but i fear that if i listen to it before i sleep it would effect all the notes that i had crammed in my head just now :(

drawing boobs was not easy back then, and i still don't get its design till this day

2011-09-17T16:06:00.000-07:00

i mean sure, i can refer to pictures but that would just feel unprofessional :/ i only refer to pictures when im drawing portraits of people (and i still suck ). i need to draw things by heart! but how are you supposed to draw these things!? what makes it too big or too small, and this is not cartoon boobs where you can just make them look like balloons, that looks fake. we need to apply gravity. but is it supposed to look that square-ish? how do you achieve the perfect shape? and for the love of god where do the nipples go? abit to the left or to the right or at the center? and am i supposed to draw cleavage or what, because i tried and it looked weird because the size of the breasts aren't proportionate. this sucks even more because i have a hard time drawing symmetrical things! (when i draw eyes, the other half always looks a tad bigger than the other half). oh divine spirit of Da-Vinci please guide me. and the faces still look anime-ish... o lord thy name is allah, please give me the ability to draw realistic humans and animals before i turn 18, amin.

Fine and Dandy

2011-09-14T10:30:00.000-07:00

i heard you spoke and you made sense,
i bid farewell to false pretenses
and in your wake, i was in for a surprise

you wouldn't fall for the average guy
it made you ever more likeable, in my eyes
and all was fine and dandy

stuck in fickle roundabouts,
I had a blast and i had doubts
but in the end im just a dusty thingamajig

perhaps you're too far fetched, a goal
i swore that you were perfect
but its apparent that im not good enough for that

and it was time well spent for me

not to be an ass hat or anything

2011-09-12T09:04:00.000-07:00

but why do you guys like to think that irony means 'coincidence'... it really ruins the fun for me when im trying to tell you guys an ironic joke. its one of my biggest pet peeves and im tired of having to face conversations like this:

Me: hey dude we're wearing the same colored shirts!

Friend: haha thats ironic!

FUCK YOU GUYS THATS NOT WHAT IRONY MEANS(amira is excused because she didn't look at me like im some sort of imbecile because i couldn't explain what irony was to her when i told her that she was wrong, thanks for having the patience to wait until last night)

she's the cutest thing ever

2011-09-12T07:59:00.000-07:00

don't change

2011-09-09T05:03:00.000-07:00

no im not talking about people im talking about bands.people change when time passes by... musicians have to update things to adapt to a new audience.... the mars volta is shortening their songs and gone are the days of weird sounds and guitar riffs, trombones and CEDRIC'S HAIR. i liked that afro :'( but hey okay at least their new song sounds abit like wolfmother and the reconteurs infused with jazz (okay maybe im exagerrating, they still sound the same, just missing the weird noises).

muse on the other hand, WHEN WILL YOU COME BACK :( i coulnd't find any substitute bands that sound similar to you guys. can you please go back to origin of symmetry-blackholes and revelations please the resistance doesn't have that certain kick

so like i didnt know that He Is We collaborated with Owl City

2011-09-08T01:39:00.001-07:00

i expected more from them :lEDIT*: okay i admit that its quite nice boleh la

you know how scott pilgrim saw ramona flowers in his dreams?

2011-09-03T03:06:00.000-07:00

and then discovers that she's real? now tell me how you would react when a make believe archetype of a girl that has been in your mind for a couple of years, turned out to be a real person at Sri Aman. and she has the same hair, same big eyes, same pale complexion and skinny, lightweight body. all thats left here is whether she has an artsy, calm and carefree personality but i wont get into that cause she's 15 (what a deal breaker).

*EDIT*: okay i was told that she is indeed a carefree, artsy and calm person.

my sister is so kewl

2011-09-02T12:04:00.000-07:00

she made me this wallet~ is so cute

and i just realized that the color scheme bears a resemblance to Perceptor

check out her other products at her tumblr

"the measure of a man is what he does with power" - Plato

2011-09-02T03:27:00.000-07:00

that being said, i need help spending my money wisely. emillio!!! check the necessary items in this checklist:

[ ] Takara Primus - RM364 (RM300 on ebay)

[ ] Takara Unicron - RM396 (RM400+ on ebay)

[ ] Beast Wars Transmetals Tigerhawk (from the 90's, legendary character) - RM74 (ebay only)

[ ] G1 Metroplex (vintage, from the 80's) - RM250+ (ebay only)

[ ] King Grimlock (silver paintjob, tons of accessories with crown) - fucking 800 bucks but i want him so badly

[ ] Takara Masterpiece Grimlock (non-king version, lacks paintjob and crown) - RM400+

[ ] Toys R Us Exclusive Grimlock (lacks accessories, but comes with crown that came with king version) - RM350+(RM320 on ebay)

[ ] Hot Toys Ironman Mark IV - RM699

[ ] Hot Toys Ironman Mark V - RM629

[ ] Hot Toys Ironman Mark VI - RM750+

[ ] Hot Toys War Machine - RM649

[ ] Wacom Bamboo Pen & Touch - RM419

or should i save money for:

[ ] PS3 Slim - RM1300

[ ] G1 Fortress Maximus (vintage, from the 80's, super rare) - RM6000+ (ebay)

for get about the last one haha i hope someone buys me that as a gift

dude what the fuck, whoever you are

2011-08-31T07:41:00.000-07:00

imagine getting home from a long day of raya-ing (eventhough its merdeka) and turning on your pc when all of a sudden 2 porn sites pop up in mozilla firefox (that happens when you don't close it properly, so im guessing this culprit just switched off my pc's plug after he was done). and if that wasn't bad enough (thank god no one else was in the room) it was MALAY porn. like what the fuck? who the hell is tech savvy enough to find those kinds of things (they were home made) and be dumb enough to not-erase all your footprints? WHO TOUCHED MY PC GODDAMMIT

selamat hari raya

2011-08-30T07:56:00.000-07:00

what i like about aidilfitri is the free money part and i tend to overlook the forgiveness part, because you can ask for forgiveness on any given day but people won't give you free money in paper envelopes that often. the value of forgiveness overweighs a million bucks, but really, in today's society: is it really worth prioritizing that over the money? the person might not be sincere and you'll get nothing out of it. i'll take the money please. (im not saying that my relatives and family members keep grudges or anything, only i do it, besides ashman).

sorry everyone if i had scarred and/or insulted you before, and yes im aware an apology won't fix things (if you're a bitch/guy bitch) so i'll make sure that i'll make it up to you guys when i can.

2011-08-27T23:05:00.000-07:00

malas

2011-08-26T10:02:00.000-07:00

is it mean for me to be ignoring birthday notifications on facebook for the past few months?

for one of those moments where i feel lost

2011-08-26T09:34:00.000-07:00

i hate feminists

2011-08-24T09:34:00.000-07:00

superfragilisticexpialidocious

2011-08-23T10:30:00.000-07:00

ramadhan is almost over, i can't believe i've made it this far. i mean, a couple more days and i'll be fasting for a full month. im so proud of myself <3 but what i don't like about ramadhan is i don't get to exercise and all the fat and muscles (albeit small) that i had gained from the past months were lost and i was reverted to my former skinny self. very skinny to be exact. im gonna try and gain them back during this last week in preparation for the bloody plkn days. fuck you government. gonna go shop for new clothes and toys this friday and the trials are coming up in a week or two. lets join forces and hope that i'll make it this time (Y)

Friends with tunes

2011-08-20T09:34:00.000-07:00

so safiah did this for whatever reason and i think it would be interesting to relate my friends with songs (im picking out the songs based on various things, the lyrics may not be relevant to said friend's personality)

1. Emillio - Rock Lobster by the B-52's

2. Marinah - Tree Tops by Eisley

3. Shakira - Anyone Else but You by The Moldy Peaches (Represent! Cover)

4. Myra - Hate This and I'll Love You by Muse

5. Amira - Hummingbird by Nevershoutnever

6. Safiah - Birthday by Bjork (The Mars Volta Cover)

7. Alya - Lets Talk About Spaceships by Say Hi To Your Mom

8. Sharlina - We Will Not Grow Old by Lenka

9. Shamsul - Oh! by SNSD

10. Basira - Unicorn by 1-800-ZOMBIE

11. ........

holy crap i just realized that i appreciate my female friends more than my guy friends.

all the cool ones that i can relate to are either in uni or not in my class ....

safiah

2011-08-20T03:11:00.000-07:00

should i relate myself to the lyrics of the song or the mood it gives you :l i dont get ittt

2011-08-18T03:56:00.000-07:00

fucking essays

2011-08-15T09:36:00.000-07:00

i dont like doing jobs based on a given theme. fuuuu. i just remembered that i have to pass up an essay tomorrow. at 12:38 pm. *microsoft word*

god im hungry

2011-08-11T02:56:00.000-07:00

im always at a lost for words and i try my best not to stutter in front of you (i think i did a pretty decent job but the last minute words do suck) because you sweep me off my feet

and since im a creepazoid the thought of you makes me feel like im made out of carbonated soda butterflies (but i hate insects but never mind this is different)

and it even calms me to the extent that i don't feel like fighting with my brother anymore and getting to talk to you made my day (possibly the whole week)

and i know this is all so cliched but i'd like to exist in the same universe with you for a very very long time (or at least until i've lived past a hundred but i don't mind living longer)

and i just wanted you to know that every time futurama had one of those fry and leela moments (if you're an avid fan of the show you would appreciate it too) it would remind me of you and i would be fry because fry always fails at these kinds of things (except in the fourth movie "into the wild green yonder"). the episode with the worms doesn't count.

life is like this big video game that i bought and i'd like to finish it with a second player and i hope you wont be in another castle any time soon (super mario reference).

hahahahahahahah

2011-08-05T20:35:00.000-07:00

2011-08-05T04:02:00.000-07:00

don't you just love it when your friend buffs your nails for you

2011-08-04T07:09:00.000-07:00

and then you keep rubbing your fingernails

pottermore can suck on this

2011-08-03T22:43:00.001-07:00

cause im sick and in love with you, dear

2011-07-31T06:52:00.000-07:00

well its about time

Ramadhan

2011-07-31T05:09:00.000-07:00

so like ramadhan is starting tomorrow and i was planning to eat the fuck out of everything today to satisfy myself but i didn't have an appetite for anything (besides waffles) during the whole day (even ice cream, seeing as its br day today). but i have high hopes for 2011, as this may be the first time that i'll fast for a complete month.

Into a World Unknnown

2011-07-30T09:50:00.000-07:00

my butterflies had gone somewhere
far and vague, its hard to tell
i won't be going anywhere
i hope you won't as well

would you love me when im boring
cause i loved you under an oath
do you think im dull or interesting
would it be okay if i am both

lets brace ourselves and try this out
while my heart's up and about
like clown fish and anemone
we'll depend on you and me

freaking dilemmas. why why why why why

2011-07-29T06:20:00.000-07:00

so like we were threatened by a justin bieber fan with connections...

2011-07-25T04:34:00.001-07:00

you can't fight hate with more hate.

IMA TELL YOU ONE TIMEEEEEEE

um da da

2011-07-25T02:57:00.000-07:00

all is full of love

2011-07-25T02:38:00.000-07:00

the feeling seems to be wearing off now, after so long. the heart keeps insisting that i'll miss out on something but the mind questions why i should continue. i flicker like a struggling light bulb as i try to answer myself. going neutral.

first world problems

2011-07-17T02:31:00.000-07:00

fuck ipads, i miss my pc :( i miss msn-ing with amira and emil and saf, i miss itunes, i miss procrasturbating

Bitch Please.

2011-07-16T10:19:00.000-07:00

"If you can't even remember the names of these characters, what have you done with your childhood?"

......If you can't even list down how many members there were in Biker Mice From Mars, remember what Rocko's dog was called, what kind of animal Ren & Stimpy were, couldn't decide whether June is a girl or a boy, didn't sing along with Bear in the Big Blue House, didn't get scared by Are You Afraid of the Dark?, didn't cry during Iron Giant, couldn't remember how Scarab became a villain, hasn't had the urge to peek under Double D's hat, doesn't know how Eddy's brother looks like, and doesn't have a clue what Earth, Fire, Wind, Water and Heart combine into, then what have YOU done with your childhood.

a decent day

2011-07-15T11:13:00.001-07:00

started the last day of the week with school, greatly anticipating the movie that i was gonna watch afterwards. it took me two weeks of "amir spm dah nak dekat" just so i could see the third installment of the transformer's movie trilogy (rumors say that there's gonna be a fourth one). the movie was okay but the fight scenes leave a lot to be desired and some anticipated characters turned out to be frickin gay in the movie but everything's kick ass like always. robot violence gets me every time but fuck the soundtrack. i think optimus prime is the best role model ever next to nabi muhammad pbuh.

i got home around 8.40 and continued working out after not doing so for 4 days.. there hasn't been alot of improvements on the outside but im getting stronger :B i can do 50 push ups in one go and 200 push ups if i take one minute breaks, and 30 sit ups in one go and 100 sit ups with 5 minute breaks. its not much for the average guy but hey im getting there (i hope).

then i tried to painstakingly get the internet to work on this damn pc and gave up before i fell asleep on the desk. then i woke up for a shower and a scary movie afterwards with my sister .

and here i am, at 2.22am, with the internet finally working, feeling content and having hot chocolate while i figure out something to do besides thinking of a way to skip tomorrow's accounting test at taylors (im a reserve anyway).

what a decent day.

glow

2011-07-15T11:03:00.000-07:00

you know how you say the coolest things to your friends but when you're talking to that certain someone it just makes your mouth numb and like, you just have to say whatever that's left in your thoughts and you can't really think of anything witty to say to them and it sucks.

just...awesome

2011-07-11T05:09:00.000-07:00

what the world doesn't need

2011-07-10T10:52:00.001-07:00

bersih 2.0 rally
feminists

Coexisting: a disorganized rant

2011-07-10T07:00:00.000-07:00

people exist with different beliefs and we, the ones claiming to be on the right path should learn to adapt to this new environment. some have said that the chinese and indian immigrants should not have the full rights as a malaysian citizen. but is it their fault? they were born here as it was their grand parents who migrated from their homelands, not them. and they came here because of our dictators. so if you really have to lash out on the bad guys go yell at the brits. oh yea right, the guys who were responsible for this whole thing is dead. what can you do? ADAPT.

people don't have to necessarily agree with the beliefs of others, but no one should be a jerk about it unless what you believe in contradicts with these things:

1. the safety of the public, or any other human being
2. religious tolerance and equal rights for all races
3. science

but what i have witnessed so far in life has made me lose hope for it. pointing fingers, violence, and propaganda: is this how mature adults solve problems? 1 malaysia my ass. the country is full of lies and hypocrites, and what irritates me most is the mentality of my fellow muslims. if islam is a religion of peace and tolerance, then why are you staining our image by getting pissed of at the slightest offenses? so what if someone made a drawing of our prophet, so what if people from another race wants religious equality. do you have to curse them for their actions? do you really think that cursing would make the opposing side apologize? if our prophet was still alive to face these things, do you really think that he would act like you guys? please use your brain for once.

some of you would reply that you are merely defending your precious religion. but by the looks of it i think you are making things worse. we were taught to be the better people, not to mimic the type of people that we oppose. would restricting the people from a different religion's rights fix everything? clearly the authorities are biased and selfish. if we had our rights stripped off from us for the sake of another religion, how would that make you feel? as much as your religion is important to you, please, for the sake of it, avoid anything that would lead to chaos. a civil war is the last thing that this country needs. thats not what god would want. stop abusing religion as an excuse to be a douchebag.

sure, if we do not take any action for this, there would be more homosexuals, more atheists, more sinners. islam doesn't force itself onto others am i right? i don't necessarily agree with homosexuals and atheists, but those types of things were meant to be between god and themselves. they don't really pose a threat to us in the real world. just concentrate on abolishing the sinners that would affect others, like rapists for example. or extremists. if a person is gay/an atheist but he has a good set of morals, what threat could he possibly pose? sure, he wont go to heaven but would you risk that and disrupt the peace in this country? if we really have to go against these people, is bashing them the way to go? of course its not. as muslims, we should find an alternative way to solve arguments.

if you haven't noticed, telling atheists that they will face god's wrath hasn't been working since, like, forever. are you dumb or what? maybe instead of threatening them with things that they don't believe in why don't you make them reconsider by explaining to them why an organized religion is okay? it might seem to be impossible but if you have enough knowledge on the subject you would prevail. and shut the hell up about things that require faith, atheists don't appreciate that. how are you supposed to make them agree with something with "because god says so". oh thats right, because you didn't learn anything from your religion. you're just a zombie who follows things because god said so. bitch, theres a good reason reason why cattle are sacrificed in that manner, why we can't eat pork, why women wear a tudung. if you can't explain these things to non muslims, then shame on you, you're just making us look like barbarians. and atheists (some of you), shame on you too because of your ignorance towards islam and pretty much all religions (excluding the ones that makes life worse).

they say that religion is the #1 cause of wars, but it seems to me that religion is just fine and dandy. whats messed up is the people. people don't understand religion well enough to live with it, people follow it the wrong way, people misuse it for their own financial gain. we humans are a proud and angry bunch, and we wont stop in anyone's way to show them who's the best.

The Amazing Adventures of Jet Cosmic: Episode 3 (Jet Cosmic Meets Taco Bandito)

2011-07-02T02:50:00.000-07:00

The impact of the crash attracted a few locals. I stood up to a view of Nada Más, their village. By the looks on their faces, they weren't particularly happy with my presence, as i happened to land on their one and only hardware store. and that one guy's dog, Poncho.

booming steps echoed out of nowhere, and everyone bowed down, revealing the silhouette of a rather large man... with a sombrero? words cannot express the feeling of a tall stereotypical mexican themed vigilante standing infront of me, looking like he's about to kick my ass. and kick my ass, he did.

i had a few broken bones but hey at least i get to use my new found powers. so...

Right arm: a gauntlet with a screen, a key pad, and a few panels.

Left arm: another gauntlet, but with a clean surface.

Helmet: a few buttons.

Chest: a few switches.

Legs: ordinary padded boots.

I didn't know how. and the sombrero guy threw a taco in my directio- HOLY SHIT A ROCKET TACO

Dammit. Im getting my pc removed from my room again due to disappointing marks for mid-term :l

2011-06-25T07:40:00.000-07:00

i would like to take the time to say temporary goodbyes to my friends on the interwebs :

good bye:

amira nasiruddin (now we're both internetless :D)

alya izzati (i don't think we interact that much. i wish i could say hi more often :U)

shamsul safwan (pong lreng lili meng jong king kong)

safiah mustafa (good luck finding someone else to tell them that you want to punch them in the face :U)

vanessaktan (gedik :U also, thats how i read your name ever since i read your name tag)

emillio daniel (i guess i really can't work during spm year :/ you either have to replace me temporarily or we should postpone things. i hope you'll be around next year :U)

daniel rossam (take care of the cult for me)

reysha (poke)

marinah rahmat (till this day im still wondering about the guy/person that you write about in your blog posts, who are they?)

myra darena (there's always one of those random midnight hellos from time to time, no biggie)

ali amir razali (i can't spam the kawad page with stuff about us anymore :l)

and bye to this beloved blog of mine, i never realized how much i love you D: i wanna continue writing about jet cosmic so much baarghsdkgsdfhdrylksdkj

The Amazing Adventures of Jet Cosmic: Episode 2 (Re-Entry)

2011-06-22T11:46:00.000-07:00

Having aliens equip you with a space suit and a jet pack before they ditch you in space is re-assuring and all but its a pretty dick move considering the absence of a user's manual. Judging from what felt like forever, i probably missed the convention. I kicked and shuffled, but you can't really move yourself as if you were swimming in water. You're just kinda stuck there. suspended in mid-air (there's no air in space) looking like a helpless goof, drifting and drifting and drifting.

I spent the remaining hours of drifting thinking about the explosion earlier. Why did my apartment explode? Who was behind all this? Was it Tim from second grade? Was it because i ruined his Glow in the Dark Spaceman card? Beats me.

After drifting for so long, i finally caught sight of the blue ball that i call home. I re entered the atmosphere with all my might, zooming down with the speed of a hundred horses. I braced myself as i was about to land in some small village in Mexico.

The Amazing Adventures of Jet Cosmic: Episode 1 (Of Humble Beginnings)

2011-06-22T11:40:00.000-07:00

I had just finished packing my things for the annual Captain Nebula Convention. Things were looking good, i had my favorite shirt on, my limited edition Captain Nebula ring with me, with a few hours left to spare till the convention starts at 2pm. Just as i closed my briefcase my ears caught a string of beeps that were getting louder and faster. By the time i realized what the beeping was all about, my apartment exploded. The blast threw me beyond earth's atmosphere, into the farther reaches of space.

I was butt naked, cold, and my mind was confused. Suddenly, i came to notice a bright light that lit up the corner of my eye, getting closer and closer. Death was about to consume me, pulling me towards it. Turns out that it was just the headlights of an alien spaceship. I didn't know what had happened until i was ejected from the ship. Now armed with interstellar equipment and bent on revenge, i became Jet Cosmic. The name highlights my jet pack which is pretty cool.

Yeah

2011-06-22T11:37:00.000-07:00

since i can't really make my presence on the internet known, (sorry to the pals who walled me on facebook, i can't really reply during the night without my dad noticing. message me lah) i'll just write short stories to pass the time.

staying awake to chase a dream

2011-06-21T04:06:00.000-07:00

accountancy. entrepreneurship. economics.

the paths that i needed. not the paths that i wanted.

as much as i love calculating things, people's transactions ain't one of em.

as much as i love solving problems, economic crisis is not fun at all.

as much as i love knowing how things work, papers and forms and boring corporations don't make my world go round.

its not like me to grieve or regret, but considering that these things would have to stick with me and affect my life and what i do, its hard not to. looking back, pmr was batshit easy. i should've studied. i could've gotten sciences. i could've been a professor of some sort. but i didn't. and you know what, i'd rather take arts as my major subject, because i have a passion for it, but no im not allowed to :/ instead, i was arranged to be placed in ik2.

even if i do get straight A's for SPM, im not sure if im gonna continue working on these subjects.

i hoped that my dad would be okay with me going to a private university so i could pursue a career that would fit my uh...talents. something that i enjoy, at least. but he insisted that the path that im pursuing is not very beneficial, money wise. he's right, since being an artist has a certain standard that has to be achieved in order to get known. you have to be the best. there are lots of competition. lots of other people with the same dream as mine. or else you'll be worth a few scraps with a disappointing pay check. but i believe in what i can do. but other people think so for themselves too.

as for this career where i have to be a robot most of the time with glasses and a suit and a tie, everyone has a fair share of something, no risks, no competitors. just plain ol' work. boring work. at least the pay is good. that is, if i wish to be an accountant. managing a company and shit has risks and competitors. i was told to keep my hobbies as what they are: hobbies.

im thinking of merging the two into this big art business though. but i don't have the qualifications and papers from school that makes me a certified person who is good in art, i wont get to build the business for sure. i'd have to contact and work with a pal who can trust me in this field.

i know, its my life, i can choose what i want. but is it worth replacing what i need for what i want :l i don't wanna live as an average joe. i want a decent pay check. i want a comfortable home. i wanna be able to repay my parents. i want my kids to have a comfortable life. i can fight for that, but im not sure if i'd enjoy it, given this path that im forced to take.

i hope i'll change to suit my needs. or find a way around this so i'd live a happy life.

i was born in this world with flaws, and i was wondering if other people were born the same way

2011-06-21T01:35:00.001-07:00

i know this might make me sound abit like an attention seeking 13 year old but:

1. am i the only one who brushes his teeth with toothpaste all over his mouth and arms

2. am i the only one who tucks his arms in his shirt before pulling it off

3. am i the only one who likes to constantly tap rhythms on the mouse in a vigorous manner

4. am i the only one who cannot help but decide whether a book should be organized according to alphabetical order or its size

5. am i the only one who washes his hands for the sole purpose of sucking his fingers after eating potato chips

6. am i the only one who tends to shift mats and small carpets with his feet without realizing it

7. am i the only one who twitches his neck and other specific parts of the body, and purposely re-twitch myself if the twitching doesn't feel right

8. am i the only one who doesn't like to share straws

9. am i the only one who has the will to curl up and fall asleep on the bathroom floor (dry area)

10. am i the only one who eats a popsicle daily

11. am i the only one who has a deep hatred towards mechanical pencils

12. am i the only one who has a fetish towards people's upper arms/biceps (preferably soft)

13. am i the only one who doesn't give a fuck about harry potter

14. am i the only one who enjoys clickity sounds

15. am i the only one who likes to keep cardboard in my room

16. am i the only one who likes to smell anything new

17. and i was told that i semi-snore, gosh -.-

FUCK YOU KID, YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT BIONICLE

2011-06-20T03:24:00.000-07:00

so like check this hot shot out, how old is he, like 6? fuck him. fuck you fuck fuck fuck fuck fucking piece of fuck. you're just one of those kids who started picking up bionicle toys during 2006-2007. you call a Vahki figure 'old'? dude, try owning one from 2003 at least, before you start talking about how you have all the figures. and the vahki isn't lame! only dumb fucks like you who play with inika-copies think like that. INIKA AND PIRAKA TEMPLATES ARE LAME. YOU'RE DUMB. they don't even have gear functions! and its pronounced PIRAKA, not PIRAKI and the gun on that skrall is a thornax launcher, not a quartec launcher (where did you even get that name?) and he's from bara MAGNA not MAGMA. and what ticks me off most is that the 'awesome' ones that you showcased was a Skrall and a 2010 Takanuva. bitch those things are nothing compared to that vahki you just dissed. and you threw it aside. do you know how hard it is to get that YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT.

i've never been so busy in my entire life. be positive.

2011-06-15T04:45:00.000-07:00

i still have an accounts folio to pass up by next week,

settle lots of kawad stuff such as flag designing, costume making with vanessa, manage the money and ensure that all 30 kids are ready to kawad with a snowflake formation which is all due by sunday, (ustaz wants to see a sample of the costume tomorrow)

pass up an essay tomorrow, something that i was supposed to do during the holidays or else my english marks would get deducted,

pass up 4 exam papers (that has to be hand written, even the objective ones with the questions and all) tomorrow or the teacher might deduct my perdagangan marks (she'll probably do it).

and to top it all off my schedule for those things are clashing with each other and i have less time for each session.

and i got like, a couple of D's for my exams and im waiting for my dad to find out and scold me.

also, spm is very very near and dad is starting to scold me about spending time on these things, which is making it harder for me to settle kawad duties..

but i think if i could climb into my mind right now all i would see is this:

and what do i get for making sure that my brain is always at its best to face complicated situations? my dad is worried and my friends think that im not settling my problems. well when everyone's busy pointing out the current situation (repeatedly), im here, always thinking about ways to sort out shit.

so much negativity in the world. and it angers me most when my friends take petty, childish issues as something mature. and it angers me more when they think that i won't be able to 'understand' their problems. then they start making stupid decisions.

what are these so called problems, you may ask? well idk...

what about my friend, who CRIED, all because she got embarrassed that a couple of my classmates joked around about her not getting and exam question right. and when i demanded to ask her why she's crying, i got told off all because i was asking in front of 3 passer-by's, and telling me that im not mature enough to understand.

what about the same person, who got depressed because her plea to add a few marks to her paper failed. the same thing happened after i tried to ask why.

what about my friend, who still wants to give his girlfriend a chance after she admits that she likes someone else but she still loves him and other crap that the girlfriend herself wont tolerate (seriously, fuck her). after explaining the logical step that he should take, i was told that i don't understand true love. well fuck you, if you can't learn to love yourself, don't you dare love someone else.

sometimes i wonder how i can still manage to live amongst idiots.

FOR FUCK'S SAKE GUYS, STOP IT. BE MATURE FOR ONCE, NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR DRAMATIC LIVES. DEAL WITH IT AS EFFICIENTLY AS YOU CAN, THINK ABOUT THE GREATER GOOD. BE OPTIMISTIC, BE RATIONAL, BE SMART.

if i could conduct an electric shock to your brains, i would.

oh and im not allowed to go online (for reals yaw) and cikgu fauzul cut my hair...

seriously japan, what the fuck hahahahahahahaha

2011-06-11T04:17:00.000-07:00

woke up early with nothing to do so i recorded a video of my cat doing cat things

2011-06-10T11:37:00.001-07:00

i City (ICT, haha, geddit, geddit!?)

2011-06-10T10:53:00.000-07:00

Snow Walk was okay.. the snow was too rough but the slide and sled thing was entertaining. the temperature was below -2 degrees celcius. the floor was slippery as hell and i had fun sliding here and there. snow fights are hard to commence since the floor only had a thin layer of fake snow, but throwing dirty shards of ice that people stepped on to your friend's faces gives me great satisfaction. but dont let it get in your mouth. DON'T. there were ice sculptures and ice forts (too bad there wasn't much snow to use with the forts) and stuff. but the fun stops once you're freezing your ass off because you kept scooping fake snow without gloves and your hands start to hurt.

overall, i give it a 6 out of 10. it could've been much better if the layer of snow was thicker. think of the snowball fights man.

i can't live without you and oxygen and my parents.

2011-06-09T17:01:00.000-07:00

an absence for either one of these things would make life very boring

*EDIT: actually i can't live without alot of things :/ but i love you all the same

cough

2011-06-06T04:48:00.000-07:00

you make me happy, whether you know it or not

2011-06-04T12:47:00.000-07:00

this is like one of my favorite scenes ever

you know what i just realized after posting this image? when i googled it i typed in 'Watchmen Kiss' but considering google's very wide range of results it should've included searches like 'Watch Men Kiss' at the same time but thank god it didn't.

don't you think that saying i love you is kinda hard even when its thrown around alot among friends but when you were saying it to your ex or crush it just makes your lips numb. and you wind up saying stuff like "i'd like to slow dance downstairs and make subtle puns about butts with you for the rest of my life".

*cue never shout never song

AWKWARD

2011-06-03T23:10:00.000-07:00

i just got back from kawad and all so before i took a shower i decided to go online for a while. since it was hot i just went online with my shirt and boxers. and then that was when my dad decided to check on me. usually, when this happens i'd freak out abit and get nervous and i'll look very suspicious since im not allowed to go online that often and he likes to make sure that i study by checking up on me.

buuuut this time he didn't do that, instead of telling me to shut down the pc like he always does he had an awkward look on his face and all he could say was "uh....dah makan nasi goreng?" when he caught me onlining in boxers, nervous, looking all suspicious (oh and i locked my door but he managed to tug it open anyway). he didn't even bother to check what was on my monitor (family guy) and drifted off.

now my dad probably thinks that he was on the verge of catching me jacking off. GREEAAAT

EDIT*: i was told that onlining in boxer shorts isn't natural, wtf guys, im not the only one am i? its not like im wearing briefs or anything

2nd June 2009

2011-06-02T04:36:00.000-07:00

Starless,

2011-06-01T08:04:00.000-07:00

i guess its about a planet that orbits around nothing that finally spots the something that he's been hoping for so his life can revolve around it.
_________________________________________________________________

he walks alone, in an interstellar park
a barren planet in the dark, with no moon to spare.

she was glowing like a star
seen skipping from afar, with a soul so fair.

amongst the diamond breeze, how can he approach her
she was far away but his heart was closer.

how can he be sure, if something's gonna start
when they're one trillion miles apart.

comets aim for her, she's the galaxy's fascination.
but she's not alone, part of a coy constellation.

she's burns the brightest, she's at the top of her game
but his molten core doesn't burn the same

he can't pull her for him to see
gravity's an absence suddenly

and yet he bears with his cranial fatique
when its apparent that she's out of his league

as he lays there, barren with no sun
patiently waiting for the one.

guilty pleasures..

2011-05-23T08:14:00.001-07:00

i kinda hate my friends sometimes (some of you, grow a brain)

2011-05-22T06:43:00.000-07:00

don't get me wrong you guys are okay its just that when my brilliant views on a certain thing collides with your awful perspective on said thing, i want to kill you guys. douches.

silence is silver, staring in to space, i wonder where you are

2011-05-21T11:04:00.000-07:00

im thinking of doing the same thing.. it kinda takes yr breath away kan?

2011-05-20T12:32:00.000-07:00

Bon Voyage, Nick

2011-05-20T10:58:00.000-07:00

i remember when we exchanged words for the first time. we were at pelita, and shamsul and atiq were there too. my first impression of nick was that he had a strong grip in life. that, and that he was probably gay.

he's a funny person and i can honestly say that i had never seen him being in a mood besides happy.

he has a deep history of stuff in his life based on our msn sessions but he never seems to talk about them in real life.

he sang one of my old poems and its pretty awesome.

it kinda feels like im about to be molested at times but thats just his way of fooling around, and im gonna miss that.

i just noticed that i never questioned why he wore glasses.

his status updates on facebook are interesting and witty.

he's straight!

So nick, take care of yourself in perak. PERAK IS FRICKIN BORING. but im pretty certain that a person like you would find alot of ways to entertain yourself! :D have fun! i hope you enjoy your Going-away Kit !

its a pretty sweet deal if you ask me

2011-05-17T05:30:00.000-07:00

Hoot

2011-05-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

i pretty much wasted all the time that i had during the day so im studying in the morning for the very first time :/ its so dark outside. teacher's day was boring....but the indian teacher in the purple shirt made everything worth it~ then i got home and went on reddit. and burned a maher zain cd for my mom and another mixed playlist for me and then summore reddit. i think my whole life revolves around reddit this year. 100 new rage-comics per day :D you dont get that kind of service anywhere else.

ADIK MANIS

2011-05-16T00:11:00.001-07:00

so like do you guys know that noodle restaurant in SACC (not Noodle Station)? it was there since the whole mall was opened. So like when i was in primary school, i had dinner there with my family. they had one of the most flamboyant waiters that you can ever find, and he's been haunting me ever since. so like during my first trip there the gay waiter displayed his interest in me and said that im handsome and all, and rubbed my head. i was traumatized.

so like more than 5 years since that fateful day, i kinda went to dinner at secret recipe with my family, but since they were closing we had to go to....the noodle restaurant. and fuck this, but the gay waiter was still there! STILL THERE. and to make matters worse, HE REMEMBERS ME. AND THIS TIME HE CALLED ME ADIK MANIS. and the way he made his grand entrance was, i kid you not, one of the most gayest displays of hello's and hi's that i had ever seen in my entire life. the way he swayed his arms and all.

ADIK MANIS

it takes years to build a reputation but 5 minutes to ruin it

2011-05-13T22:08:00.000-07:00

its kinda annoying that this post box-area thing is on the left of the screen. i wish it was placed more in the middle so i wouldn't have to move my chair to the left to make it look like its in the middle.

feeling bad about yourself, realizing that you're no different than the others is uncomfortable, no? then hope tells you that at least you've changed first before the others did. should i call that self assurance, or ego? does that depend on how good i am as a whole? will the average person exaggerate on another person's dark deed? what about good deeds, would they amplify those things too? will it wear out in time or does it depend on who you're dealing with? if you get a dark offer from someone, does it mean that you're already one with the bad bunch or is it a chance to prove to yourself that you are not? and all of this depends on who you're asking. blegh.

but my aunt sent me cheddar cheese...in a tube! :D i wish there were more of these in malaysia

Fuck you, 10% of my english test marks.

2011-05-08T00:13:00.000-07:00

Turns out that besides NILAM, another 5% of our english test is based on an essay we have to write at home. Which is good, since i have all the time i'd need during the weekends to make an essay thats well thought-out, something thats hard to accomplish in 45 minutes during the exam. But you have to write this long ass essay, and it only grants you 5%. WHAT A RIP-OFF. I tried making the topic of my essay to look as mature and deep as possible to suit pn wan fatinah's standards :/ it didnt turn out exactly as i wanted it to be but time is running out, i have to study for perdagangan and this essay is due tomorrow :/

Choose one of the topics below:

1. Write about a person who has worked hard to succeed in life.
2. Parents always know best, do you agree?
3. Growing up.
4. Write a story with ".... Now i realize the value of a friend".
5. Food.

Hope in a Spectrum of Black and White Hues
By Amir Norman

Growing up. I have seen it taking away the souls of others, reducing them into a boring representation of grey mass that reside in the cold, cold depths of the universe, or planet Earth, at least. Each and every one of my friends, cast away into the oblivion that is growing up.. just terrifies me as I wait my turn.

Times have changed. Everything I used to know and love, gone. Years ago, all I ever knew was to watch tv, breathe, and play. I remember that everything seemed much bigger back then. Couches were mountains, the underside of the dinner table was a cave and the underside of a chair was my office. I built castles from scratch, with all the mattresses and pillows that were available for me to tamper with. Everything was possible. With the power of imagination, I had the will to bend reality itself to suit my needs. With all the powers that I had at the time, I entitled myself as a super hero. I was a good one too, I never expected anything in return for my deeds to the toy citizens that I serve. But alas, that was a long time ago.

Now, back to the present. I have outgrown the very mountains and caves that I had once climbed and seeked shelter from, and I do not fit in my office anymore. The building materials that I once used for my impenetrable fortress does not meet up with the proper building requirements to fit a giant like me. All my friends have evolved into a state where their primary concern in life is about the way they look, the fights they have with their girlfriends and boyfriends that could’ve been easily avoided, and the latest trends. I feel like an obtrusive flower patch in the middle of the sahara desert. I am no longer a super hero, but a mere citizen, living amongst the chaos in a dead civilization, waiting for a savior to come and add a little color and depth back in everyone’s lives.

You see, when we grow up, we learn. And when we learn we have to apply our new found knowledge to the world around us. Mistakes we made when we were kids were forgivable, we were innocent. Now we are aware that all actions lead to a consequence, and we cannot live our lives as we please. We need order in the world. But everyone seems to ignore this fact, and they go on and spoil theirselves with cigarrettes and drugs that they picked up when they left their kid-selves. Even I had done terrible things before, to be honest (but none of them ever effected my well being, I assure you). So growing up was a bad idea, I thought to myself, as it drains everyone of their innocence. But I was less mature at the time, mind you. So I decided to give growing up another shot. “When you can’t beat em, join em” right? And that was when everything kind of sorted itself out.

Growing up happens to everyone, but you can’t expect it to have the same effect on everyone, as it does not necessarily come with maturity. Yes, my corrupted friends that I talked about earlier technically became that way because they grew up, but who said growing up stops right there? They simply haven’t grown up enough. Like I said, when we grow up, we learn. We just need to learn more until we settle into just the right frequency that makes us a decent person. Im only 17 years old after all, I still have much to learn. Life isn’t about fun and games, its about surviving. We don’t come across super heroes that often and that is why we should learn to grow up and take care of ourselves. Real heroes don’t lie around, watch tv and have adventures, they are mature people who solve things by being complex. Growing up isn’t about letting yourself go, its actually helps you discover who you really are, and I hope that one day, I will grow up into the super hero that I once dreamed to be.

i asked my mom if she'd like to see me punch the ceiling

2011-05-06T04:45:00.001-07:00

even after the warnings and "no!"'s and unheard pleas coming from her mouth, i tried to punch the ceiling anyway. i jumped and i jumped but i failed (by an inch)so i told her to see me do it again in two years. i managed to slap the ceiling though. i just realized that mothers day is already around the corner. and i have NO PRESENT YET OMG.

also, mid term is starting next week OMG. and i bet everyone else is as panicky as i am, so i present to you a couple of relaxing tunes:

okay you know what, youtube's embed function isn't working right now so lets just talk about something else. i can rarely go online now because of the exams and my dad likes to walk in on me onlining, and he'll ask me to study instead :l im currently using my pc because i have to finish an essay :) but i can't really do alot of things on facebook since my dad stalks my activities.... so everything has to either go on a private group's page or through messaging >.< but my dad is currently having a study group with his friends right now :D but i have to go now since theres this simulasi haji thing tomorrow and i was told that its gonna come out in agama's paper...

goodnight! you have learned nothing from this post hahahah

Submarine

2011-04-30T00:23:00.001-07:00